she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
