so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
