whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She said her name was "party"
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
