That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
