You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
