...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
