I bet he comes in French.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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