She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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