im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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