Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
well most of my day revolves around power hour
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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