Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
