dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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