The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
