youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
