I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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