she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize