doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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