Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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