Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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