in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
