There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
