dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Farmville is her only friend.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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