dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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