the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
