I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
