it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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