Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Randomize
