but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
