She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
