you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
