Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
