I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
