i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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