There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Randomize
