The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
