Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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