What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
How external is "for external use only"?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize