Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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