so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize