Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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