it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
