Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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