I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize