He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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