she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
