he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Drake has all the answers
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