just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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