I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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