I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
