she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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