even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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